Hotel JS Alcudi Mar in Platja de Muro

Vibe: Came for sun and sangria, left with stories we’ll be telling for years (whether we want to or not). Let’s begin with the good bits (because my therapist says I should start with positives): Location: Can’t complain. A 2-minute walk to the beach means you can go from bed to beach towel in record time. Great food spots all within flip-flop range. Shopping therapy: Palma is just a bus ride away. We needed the retail detox after the buffet. Only downside? The bus was so full we stood the entire hour. Great for posture, less so for mood. Reception crew: Calm, friendly, and clearly trained in disaster management (more on that later). The AC wasn’t working when we checked in. Nothing says “welcome to your room” like hot, stagnant air. Luckily, maintenance came and resuscitated it before we fully melted. As a kind gesture, we were offered a complimentary bottle of cava — a small touch that we appreciated. Cleaners and waiters were doing their best and honestly deserve medals. Room service even surprised us with some creative towel art, which was a fun and thoughtful touch. The bartender was a legend… friendly, fast, and made an espresso martini that felt like the calm before the storm. Bonus tip: Five minutes from the hotel is Restaurant S’Albufera, home of a T-bone steak so good it made me question my life choices up to that point. Flavorful, juicy, and absolutely worth cheating on the hotel buffet for. Now entering the plot twist portion of our stay: My wife said the beds felt like they were built for prisoners with back problems. I couldn’t agree more. They were so uncomfortable, I briefly considered sleeping in the elevator. Buffet staff: moved with the enthusiasm of robots running low on battery…polite but barely present. The buffet food was… edible. Hygiene, not so much. Guests were all using the same tongs and then placing them back on the food like it was part of the recipe. Gourmet germs, anyone? One night we were greeted by a big fat cockroach in our bathroom. Not your average bug. This one had weight. It looked like it paid rent and had opinions about the minibar. It was also surprisingly hard to eliminate. It dodged, countered, and refused to go quietly. Honestly, it deserved its own action sequence. And then the plot thickened: One creative guest thought it’d be hilarious to put inappropriate realistic rear-end decals in the elevator. Let’s just say it made every ride awkwardly memorable. One night, our next-door unhinged neighbor decided to spice things up by physically and verbally threatening me, as if we’d all signed up for some kind of all-inclusive Escape Room: Mallorca Edition. The hotel did move us to another room and floor (thank you), but had no real policy or protocol for dealing with aggressive or violent guests. That left us feeling unsafe, and that’s not something you want on a family holiday. And the fact that there’s no plan for handling guests who think they’re starring in a low-budget action movie? That’

We stayed at this hotel in July 2025. The air conditioning in our room was not working, even though the heat was unbearable. With 10 month old baby suffering from the high temperature, the situation quickly became unbearable. It was a real nightmare. What was even more shocking is that no one informed us about this issue earlier during the day. We were then offered a lower category room, facing the parking lot, next to the reception, with a bad smell and insects. When we asked for compensation for the difference between the room we had originally booked (with a sea view) and the one we were given clearly of much lower quality, we were simply offered a drink worth €7, which was truly shameful. The manager was extremely rude and dismissive. I sent a detailed complaint to the hotel right after we left, but to this day, I have received no response, despite the seriousness of the inconvenience we experienced.Customer service is non-existent when there is a problem, and there is a clear lack of respect and concern for guests’ well-being. Very disappointed. I do not recommend this hotel.